Reason #383

When you find yourself taking notes from a Radio 4 programme at 8:30am at least you don’t have to keep looking over your shoulder to check they haven’t woken up yet.

Reason #382

You’re a grown up with a degree and career goals for chrissake, ‘Oh man I really want to kiss them again right now’ is not a valid thought pattern.

Reason #381

Seminar on mortgages or an actual mortgage? We’ll spend that money on gin and flapjacks if it’s all the same to you.

Reason #380

At least when the only men in your life are under 16 and come in groups of 30 there’s no societal judgement about you going home to an empty house and opening a bottle of wine.

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Reason #379: At least you think you’re funny.

Reason #378

When your best friend thinks a first kiss at a bus stop is ‘very you’, it’s probably best to admit defeat.

Reason #377

At least when it’s your career keeping you up until four in the morning there’s no shame in explaining your exhaustion to your mum.

Reason #376

‘Take the case of a man in love who is caught acting disgracefully…I think it would cause him more pain to be seen in this situation by his boyfriend than by his father, his friends, or anyone else.’ - Plato, The Symposium.

Because when you act disgracefully as often as we do, you’ve got to cut your losses somewhere.

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Reason #375: This response is only appropriate when the only thing on all fours in front of you is a cow. 

Reason #374

Pulling sales reps is all well and good until you realise they only want you for your money.

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Reason #373: No awkward couples photos at graduation that’ll only put a damper on your success when you break up three weeks later.

Reason #371

Rather than romantic breaks, you can have educational holidays - learning, for example, whether or not it’s true what they say about African men.

Reason #370

It is a universal law that the day you decide to tell someone you’re into them will be the day you find out they like someone else. Via their tumblr.

Reason #369

It’s claustrophobic enough on the tube as it is, without being cornered by an affection addicted other-half.

Reason #368

Trust me, when looking back over those old photos of you and your latest obsession you’ll be glad you didn’t get into anything with them.